School…Heat…No time to complain!

So…My son is in year-round-schooling.
We had 7 weeks of summer.
I can't really complain that school started again. I kind of like having my routine back.
It's nice having time during the day with my daughter and being able to run around with JUST her.
Not to say that my son is a handful (in fact, he's probably the lesser between the two), but getting things done is always easier with just one of the kids. I think any parent would agree!
The downer of the first week of school has been the horrible heat.
We're inland in California, and the heatwave of summer seemed to finally hit.

Growing up near the beach, I never experienced the heat as I have living inland as an adult.
I would have to say that I highly prefer the cool ocean air breezes!
But, I am thankful for the cooler nights and the wonderful air conditioning!!!
AND, the hopefulness of an El Nino later this year is keeping my attitude in gratitude.
We need the rain SO BAD!!!!

The other nice thing about school starting again is that I have been able to take time to write my memoir!
Yes…I have started to write my memoir about my experience, emotional/mental/spiritual growth in regards to the tragedy my family endured when my dad made some pretty horrible decisions that impacted us and our community.
It's been a little bit hard to write things. The event happened over eleven years ago, but writing about it and reading over things opens the flood gates of my emotions and brings memories back so vividly.

I know that I HAVE to write this though. I have known for a while that this is something that I am suppose to do. I just pray that I am able to complete it with the ability to help others.

I will try to update frequently on different things that are going on in regards to such…

I have still been working on my artwork as well! The latest that I have finished is part of my "Baby-Carrying" Series…

This is my Japanese Version! I am very proud of it!

I am now working on a male version!

A dad carrying a kid. This one will be fun too…

I am also working on a butterfly on black…

(I've actually done a lot more than what this picture shows…I'll post a new picture later)

AND…I started a large Cat Face…

(I will post that one later, too)

So, as you can see, there is really no time to complain…I am just too busy! But, I like it that way!

Have a blessed day!!!

~Sea Shelly

My Visit Home always makes me want to move back more…

…If only I had the ability to take off and just move. 

On my visit home (which was much too short to my liking) I was able to visit family that I had never met before on my husbands side- They were absolutely the nicest and sweetest people that I ever imagined them to be, I celebrated my daughter's fourth birthday with family, I got snuggles with my beautiful nephew, I got to go to the most beautiful-dreamlike place on the planet (Big Sur) to watch my Brother-in-Law and his brother play softball, we celebrated my BIL's brother's birthday, I had real adult conversations and I also had fun just being.

This is the present that I made for my BIL's Brother…A beautiful asymmetrical dreamcatcher...

   

My daughter's 4th birthday was so fun! She wanted a unicorn cake…so I made this one, thanks to the help of google images. I was able to make this one super fast! 

 Here's my mom shooting pictures…LOL

 Here is me and the sweetest PitBull you'll ever set your eyes on! Buster Brown is my sister's dog. Yes, he's a putty, but the funniest, goofiest sweetest one I'ver ever known!

 My son cheering for his Uncle's to win the softball game (which they did!)...

 My beautiful sister and my nephew and daughter walking around during the game...

 And HERE is what I love and miss on a consistent bases…The beautiful, damp, cool, foggy air.

The feeling of closeness with the heavens and the ocean in one…

Man oh man, do I miss it more and more each time that I see this...

 Sometimes, if I let myself, I get discouraged and wonder why God doesn't just let me do and go to the places that I desire in my heart. After all, I'm not asking to be a millionaire, or to travel the world, or even to do whatever I want whenever I want. I want to live a simple life…I just would like to live near home. 

Near the coast, to cool air, the sea breeze.

Near the Big Sur trees, the San Padres Mountains, and the beautiful beaches that call you though you rarely venture in because they prove to be too cold and treacherous.

I want to be near my family and the love and support that I desire.

I'm sure that others would ask why where I am is not enough…and my answer is : It is to a degree.

I have my beautiful children and my hard working husband, I have even made some wonderful friends here and go to a pretty awesome church, BUT it is not what I desire whole heartedly…

My desires of my heart are simple…I want my family and I to be home, where I grew up. I would love a little land to have a simple self-sufficient home where I can have a vegetable garden and have chickens. I would love to have a weekly dinner with family. To attend the same church with family. To have my children see their grandparents and aunts and uncles on a weekly basis instead of just 3 times a year. Is that selfish? Is that too much to ask? Are my dreams too big?

I know that God allows exactly what we need and no more…but I want to have this dream with all my heart to come true…

I want to experience more than what I have…

Even if I die the next day, I would be satisfied to know that my desires of my heart were accomplished and given to me.

I have hope…

I will not give up on my dreams…

This life is nothing without dreams and desires…

Poem for the Past…"Forgive Me"

So… I have been writing poetry for about twenty years now…I started very young. I love to write when the spirit moves me. It moved me tonight, and I thought I would share my poem.

It's called, "Forgive me"...

It's my fault

we're not who we are

Too many steps back

I can't retrace my steps

To get to the place

To feel what we did

Forgive me…Forgive me

I had hopes and

you had dreams

we had notions

that we would always be

We wouldn't fall apart

We would evolve from the start

Forgive me…Forgive me

I can still feel you

In my memory

I try not to see you

to see you in me

The sadness might take over

The bend might finally break

Forgive me…Forgive me

Writing is all I permit

my heart to bleed out

In hopes it might soon loose

The ability to feel you in it

Will there be an end

When you will be my friend

Forgive me…Forgive me!