…If only I had the ability to take off and just move.
On my visit home (which was much too short to my liking) I was able to visit family that I had never met before on my husbands side- They were absolutely the nicest and sweetest people that I ever imagined them to be, I celebrated my daughter's fourth birthday with family, I got snuggles with my beautiful nephew, I got to go to the most beautiful-dreamlike place on the planet (Big Sur) to watch my Brother-in-Law and his brother play softball, we celebrated my BIL's brother's birthday, I had real adult conversations and I also had fun just being.
This is the present that I made for my BIL's Brother…A beautiful asymmetrical dreamcatcher...
My daughter's 4th birthday was so fun! She wanted a unicorn cake…so I made this one, thanks to the help of google images. I was able to make this one super fast!
Here's my mom shooting pictures…LOL
Here is me and the sweetest PitBull you'll ever set your eyes on! Buster Brown is my sister's dog. Yes, he's a putty, but the funniest, goofiest sweetest one I'ver ever known!
My son cheering for his Uncle's to win the softball game (which they did!)...
My beautiful sister and my nephew and daughter walking around during the game...
And HERE is what I love and miss on a consistent bases…The beautiful, damp, cool, foggy air.
The feeling of closeness with the heavens and the ocean in one…
Man oh man, do I miss it more and more each time that I see this...
Sometimes, if I let myself, I get discouraged and wonder why God doesn't just let me do and go to the places that I desire in my heart. After all, I'm not asking to be a millionaire, or to travel the world, or even to do whatever I want whenever I want. I want to live a simple life…I just would like to live near home.
Near the coast, to cool air, the sea breeze.
Near the Big Sur trees, the San Padres Mountains, and the beautiful beaches that call you though you rarely venture in because they prove to be too cold and treacherous.
I want to be near my family and the love and support that I desire.
I'm sure that others would ask why where I am is not enough…and my answer is : It is to a degree.
I have my beautiful children and my hard working husband, I have even made some wonderful friends here and go to a pretty awesome church, BUT it is not what I desire whole heartedly…
My desires of my heart are simple…I want my family and I to be home, where I grew up. I would love a little land to have a simple self-sufficient home where I can have a vegetable garden and have chickens. I would love to have a weekly dinner with family. To attend the same church with family. To have my children see their grandparents and aunts and uncles on a weekly basis instead of just 3 times a year. Is that selfish? Is that too much to ask? Are my dreams too big?
I know that God allows exactly what we need and no more…but I want to have this dream with all my heart to come true…
I want to experience more than what I have…
Even if I die the next day, I would be satisfied to know that my desires of my heart were accomplished and given to me.
I have hope…
I will not give up on my dreams…
This life is nothing without dreams and desires…
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